For weeks I’d convinced myself “I got this” …..
Mind over matter combined with phenomenal support and faith, piece of cake? Denial.
Just as a woman’s delivery pain is eased holding her newborn; the memories flashback in the duration of the next pregnancy.
Double chemo is quite similar. I’ll rephrase that… Chemo
Last Thursday was my final dose of double meds leaving two single treatments. Of course I was familiar with the side effects but the reality I placed aside, to get me through.
It’s a creeping ordeal with each treatment & following effects totally out of order. Last night ….. Insomnia. A slow and consistent itch, feet, hands, the unreachable area of your back, eyes everywhere & anywhere. Take Benadryl ….. Shower; scrubbing as though you could wash the chemo away …. Not
Sheets no blanket, blankets no coverage, one two or three pillows, try the sofa, back to bed, TV music or silence. Watching the time. Talk to yourself, God & loved ones past.